Tolerations. We all have them – those things that bug us and drive us crazy!  These irritants take energy away from us and stall us.  Tolerations are simply people, situations, and stuff that are draining our energy and holding us back.   Tolerations are things you are putting up within your life.  Put your energy in a bucket; tolerations are holes in the bucket that are leaking and draining off your energy!  Tolerations often come from the following sources:

  • Home
  • Transportation
  • Relationships/Family
  • Work
  • Financial
  • Caregiving
  • Self (physical & mental)
  • Lifestyle
  • Social Media


  • We tolerate for many “good” reasons.   Some are conscious, and some are unconscious to us
  • Tolerations are expensive, and I am not referring to just $$$ they cost us in energy, discomfort, emotional stress, etc.
  • Reducing toleration’s energizes a person
  • Understand the reasons behind your tolerations before you eliminate it
  • You can prevent them from reoccurring
  • Setting boundaries prevents tolerations


  • Guilt/Shame
  • Sense of powerlessness
  • Ignorance
  • Lack of awareness
  • Lack of money
  • Lack of support systems
  • Over-promising
  • Inadequate self-responsibility
  • Weak boundaries
  • Low standards
  • Procrastination

..identifying the causes can aid in getting rid of them!

Tolerations can be useful, though. They remind us we are human. Strengthen our ability to accept things. Teach us to let go of things we think should be a certain way. Push us to be creatively focused and help us look at ourselves.  Controlling or eliminating tolerations is about managing your own choices and behavior; it’s not about FIXING everyone around you.

We can create a Toleration Free Zone (TFZ). How? Broadening our perspective is a start.  Becoming more empathetic and compassionate for where others are coming from, so they don’t grate on us. 

Where do we end up if your zone is free? Ideally, you become a person that doesn’t put up with anything, which isn’t realistic. Keep in mind toleration free is not about becoming Intolerant!



  1. Brainstorm your tolerations and then identify your TOP 25.
  2. Look at them and ask yourself the reasons behind the toleration before you move to eliminate it!
  3. Work on 1-2 tolerations a week. Prioritize them. Aim to eliminate them and move them to the Toleration Free Zone. What will it take to make it happen?  Then work on another!  Once you have moved the ones you want to the TFZ, then go back to step 1 and repeat the process!
  4. Coaching questions that may be helpful:  What reasons are you tolerating this?  What are the costs? What will happen if I do nothing? What is the value to you to begin working on things that you are tolerating in your life and moving them to the toleration free zone?   It is all about the Shifts-resource for this article from the Toleration Free Program from Coachville.
  5. Let’s talk regarding coaching to shift your tolerations to the Toleration Free Zone